Do Dogs Hold Grudges? 🐾 Vet Insight on Dog Emotions (2025) 🐶

By Dr. Duncan Houston BVSc

Your dog avoids you after a nail trim, or acts “off” after a scolding. But is that a grudge—or something else?

I’m Dr. Duncan Houston. In this article, we’ll dive into how dogs process experiences, whether they hold grudges, and how to repair trust if something goes wrong.

🧠 Can Dogs Hold Grudges?

Short answer: not in the way humans do.

Dogs don’t experience complex, lingering resentment the way people define “grudges.” But they do form emotional associations with people, places, and experiences—especially when strong emotions (fear, pain, joy) are involved.

🧬 How Dog Memory Actually Works

• 🧠 Associative memory – Dogs remember what happened and how it made them feel (e.g., “When I saw the nail clippers, I got hurt.”)
• 🕒 No timestamped memory – Dogs don’t dwell on the past, but they do react based on past patterns
• 👤 Emotional tagging – Dogs connect specific people or objects with past feelings—good or bad

Translation: If your dog seems cold after a stressful event, they’re not “mad”—they’re cautious or confused.

🗣️ What Feels Like a Grudge (But Isn’t)

• 🚫 Avoiding you after a bath, nail trim, or vet visit
• 🐾 Hiding when they see a leash or travel crate
• 😐 Acting distant after a scolding or timeout

These behaviors are about trust and emotion, not revenge or resentment.

⚠️ Why “Punishment” Can Damage Relationships

• 🧠 Dogs live in the moment—delayed punishment doesn’t make sense to them
• 📉 Harsh correction damages trust and increases anxiety
• 🚫 Growling or retreating = a communication attempt, not defiance

Vet Tip: Redirect behavior, don’t reprimand emotion. If your dog growls—thank them for the warning and work on the root cause.

✅ How to Rebuild Trust After a Negative Event

1. Go Slow With Triggers

• 🎯 Don’t force your dog back into scary situations (e.g., grooming, vet, car rides)
• 🎁 Reintroduce tools (nail clippers, harness, crate) with treats and praise

2. Let Them Come to You

• 🪑 Sit calmly in the same room without reaching or crowding
• 🧸 Offer a soft toy or chew, and reward any voluntary approach

3. Pair Presence with Positive Experiences

• 🥣 Feed meals near you
• 🧠 Play short training games using a 

4. Be Predictable

• 📅 Dogs feel safest when routines are steady
• ⏱️ Use clear signals before doing anything hands-on (e.g., nail trims)

📋 Common “Grudge Myths” (Debunked)

Myth Truth "My dog pooped on the floor to spite me." Dogs don't understand spite. Accidents are from stress, not revenge. "He growled because he’s angry at me." Growling is fear or boundary setting—not personal dislike. "She’s ignoring me because I went on vacation." She's readjusting to your return, not punishing you.

🎁 Products That Support Positive ReAssociation

• Bungee Lead – Adds comfort and control during reintroduction to walks
• Explorer Harness – Gentle, escape-proof, perfect for confidence rebuilding
• Dual Pocket Treat Dispenser – Reward calm, trusting behavior in any environment

💬 What Dog Parents Say

“Our dog avoided us after one bad grooming experience. We followed this guide and earned his trust back in two weeks.” – Chloe & Rocket

“We thought our dog ‘held grudges’—turns out, we just didn’t know how to rebuild trust. Now he runs to us after every bath.” – David & Luna

👩⚕️ Need Help Rebuilding Trust With Your Dog?

Send your dog’s triggers, recent experiences, and behavior history to Ask A Vet and get a personalized, vet-reviewed emotional recovery plan.

Final Thoughts

Dogs don’t hold grudges—but they do remember how you make them feel. Focus on calm, consistent reassurance, and use positive associations to rebuild confidence. Respect their signals, and they’ll return to you with tail wags—not tension.